reality checks

slowly and gradually i pick up the bits and pieces of the fact that

1. nothing is forever, not even those friends that you think could last you till the day you die.
2. ambiguosity is a bitch. either you get what you want or you fuck up a big time.
3. truthful and sincere friendship is getting harder and harder to get as you aged.
4. everyone has its own agenda, the free gap in yours doesn't mean the same to mine.
5. a true friend will not use you to please its other friends. that's the lamest thing to do if you are a human of dignity.
6. whatever has happened is a fact albeit it is a history. you can't erase the past.
7. it goes like a cycle. you are always fated to bump into people that you used to be real close after a very long time.
8. keep your friend close, keep your enemies even closer. if i so happen to fall into your category of enemies. so learn to luv me bitch. muacks.
9. is not hard for me to distinguish between real and fake. so stop tryin too hard. is ugly if you can't even do the 'real' part, what again faking stuff.
10. our directions in life and our valuation system towards human, material and soul is going in a different direction - blame no one - that's part of the process of growing up.

lately, i've been listening to.....

1. tim hecker - the album - harmony in ultraviolet
2. lupe fiasco - catchy
3. the klaxons - esp the track gravity's rainbow & four horsemen
4. arcade fire - the album - neon bible (although not as catchy as the 1st, but at least it is not a 'sophomore jinx' kinda scenario
5. juggaknots - the album - use your confusions - SO KICK-ASS
6. OOIOO - the album - taiga - good when you need just wordless music to unwind
7. dalek - everything of it
8. air - pocket symphony
9. modest mouse - their new album - we were dead before the ship even sank - the album title is more catchy than its music - maybe it takes time to digest...
10. 50 cents - the track 'you don't know' - i seriously don't know why i'm digging it so much out of a sudden

The Beat that my Heart Skipped (De battre mon coeur s'est arrêté)

i prefer this french version poster, it says more with the blood on his shirt.

so i went for it last night at the only place in town that show the movie-cineleisure d'sara - its Picture House section (something like GSC International screen) where they will show those damn nice flicks without you knowing it, unless u check their movie listing everyday. heh.

i've been wanting to watch it, reasons being :

1. i dig the movie title

2. i dig movie with piano as the co-theme

overall is quite a good one, albeit there are some draggy part in between. i have some questions

1. what is the electro (which i think is electroclash ) that thomas is digging with his Sony headphone ? i know plenty of telepopmusik and bloc party are playing in his headphone, but what are the electro stuff that he said he luv and he happily shared it with his dad.

2. what is the beat that actually makes his heart skipped a beat ? at first i thought was the extraordinary relationship of him between his thuggish life and classical piano music. but towards the end of the movie. i think the beat was simply when he is holding the gun deciding whether to cross over to the dark side by ending the life of the notorious russian guy. (that's why the french poster speaks for a thousand words).

personally i think thomas is a typical guy approaching 30. not sure of his directions in life and tend to look back to the past. his has this ambiguous feelings towards everyone around him. to his colleague's wife that he slept with (is lust more than love), to his piano coach (whom eventually became his girlfriend) and to his father (i think he loves him the most ). after a failing the audition, he finally realised that his talent is not in piano playing. his passion for playing piano was simply just a nostalgic spot that he had for his late mother. the last scene was shown with blood on his Christian Dior white shirt (as on the french poster) depicted that he ain't in favour of a thuggish life but he did that for his late father. that's why towards the end he had actually changed from his funky Chelsea boots to a normal leather shoes. (i kinda dig his Chelsea boots!)

is a french movie, so you don't have to worry about not seeing any nice shirts, jacket or shoes. i luv all the shirts that thomas was wearing in the movie, especially those he wore to this piano lessons. it is so subtle yet attractive. his black leather jacket still tops it all ! vintage and used leather jacket. priceless !

i was told that it was a remake of Fingers (1978). besides that, i watched Zodiac's trailer. wow, it has my 3 favourite stars in it - jake, chloe and robert jr. !

rate 6/10

Elizabethtown

so romantic, watching sunrise together

one of my favourite scene

directed by cameron crowe , whom also directed Vanila Sky, Jerry McGuire & Almost Famous

ain't a big fan of kirsten and orlando. but i thought i need to watch a laid-back movie. so it went. quite a touching movie, laced with family, friends and lovers' love. i like the character played by kirsten, she is mysterious, witty and bubbly at the same time. orlando's performance was just passable. susan sarandon is good, she has only 3-4 scenes. but she stole the limelight, especially the last scene, where she gave her speech during her husband's funeral.

the movie is full of witty quotes. here are some of it :-
I’m impossible to forget, but hard to remember.

There's a big difference between a failure and a fiasco.

Is there such a thing as partial cremation.

Drew, it was real, and it was great, and it was really great. (this is a great dump-line. orlando's gf said this to end their relationship)

Men see things in a box, and women see them in a round room.(i luv this quote the most)

I think I've been asleep most of my life.

Hey, you're only 45 minutes away. You wanna meet halfway and see the sunrise? At this point it's probably easier to stay up!

What is that word...? Whimsical! (orlando said this when he went and see his father's deadbody)

I don't know a lot about everything, but I do know a lot about the part of everything that I know, which is people.

I've just recently decided that the things we know aren't black and white.

I've spent so much time thinking about all the answers to the problem, that I forget what the problem *actually* was.

Death and life. And death and life. Right *next door* to each other! There's like, there's a hair between them. (this is so true, death and life is just separated by a fine thin line)

I want you to get into the deep beautiful melancholy of everything that's happened. (i will melt if someone say this to me ;-)

It takes time to be funny. It takes time to extract joy from life. (susan sarandon said this during her speech at her husband's funeral)

Sadness is easier because its surrender. I say make time to dance alone with one hand waving free.

I'm going to miss your lips. And everything attached to them.

If it wasn't this... it'd be something else. (orlando's deceased father famous line)

300 - Honour, Glory & Love

reminds me of darth vader
village demonished by the brutal beast
reminds me of lady in the water - shyamalan's

interesting script was written for this scene

kill je la

spartan - i luv the thing that spartan wear on the head, reminds me of trojan washing powder

again trojan washing powder

this is spartan !

personally i don't really like it. i expect something more gore, more brutal, more blood-splattering ,more chiseled flesh....

the history part was pretty comprehensive.

the costume design - awesome, especially the greek ladies and of course the persian king Xerxes (what a name to pronounce !) i can't help but admiring those accessories he was wearing.

the fighting scene was ok, get to see plenty quite fake looking head flying here & there.

virtual backgrounds + dark sepia & muted color tones = graphic novel roots sensation + visual and audible feast for the senses. (bravo)

the music - blended orchestral + heavy metal score (bravo also)

rate 6/10

yohji, margiela, V&R, manish arora - grotesque stuff !

moschino - needless to wear anything. just get the tan will do.
yohji yamamoto mocking LV

yohji again

viktor & rolf

martin margiela

manish arora - new dehli's designer (my pick)

manish arora again

gareth pugh (uk)

tagged by lil271 ! i'm a weirdo in 6 ways...

honourly tagged by lil271 to write on my 6 weirdness

the rules are as follows; each person who gets tagged needs to write a blog post of their own 6 idiosyncrasies (abnormal behaviour, habits etc.) as well as clearly state this rule. after you state your 6 weirdness you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their multiply id at the bottom of your blog. don’t forget to leave a comment that says "you’re tagged" in their comments and tell them to read your blog for information as to what it means."

here you go !

1. dislike talkin on the phone (unless is work-related). i have this tingling sensation in my head after chattin for a while. hate it. that's why i hardly talk alot over the handphone. i prefer sms sometimes.

2. i read the newspaper backwards. i prefer to read what is goin out outside malaysia. local news is very much the same everyday. ini gaduh itu, itu gaduh ini. ini rasuah itu, itu rasuah ini.

3. i can eat desserts as a meal. be it lunch or dinner. even breakfast. y'day i had a hell lotta brownie for breakfast. courtesy of my sis. she got them from the house of brownie.

4. my eyes tend to wander when i'm having a conversation with anyone. i just luv observing people. everyone is like a storybook. waiting to be unfold.

5. i have a thing for guy that looks not so clean, not so proper, not so decent. appearance wise i mean.

6. i dislike taking bath or shower. i wouldn't do that more that twice a day. unless i hit the gym or something like that. and i took at least half an hour for that. don't ask me why it takes me so long. i just need to do it MY WAY.

seira, shuk yin, fonkey monkey, jill chow, jerry, casey loh - you're tagged to do what i've just did.

Lion's Head 獅子頭

Lion's head is a HuaiYang dish consisting of large meatballs (pork) (about 7-10cm in diameter) stewed with vegetables.

The name derives from the shape of the cabbage, which together with the meatball resemble a lion's head.
The dish originated from the region of YangZhou and ZhenJiang in JiangSu province. Jiangsu Cuisine's main cooking techniques are braising and stewing, thereby enhancing the original flavor and sauce. The elegant color, novel sculpts, with salt and sweet taste will soothe your stomach. The Jiangsu cuisine has several branches, including Shanghai cuisine.

In northern China, especially in Beijing, the dish is known as "Sixi Wanzi" ("Four Happy Balls") because the meatballs are usually served in a set of four.

First mix the ground pork, egg white, crabmeat, rice wine, salt, scallions and ginger into a rather stiff mixture. Then divide it into 4 portions and roll each portion into a meatball. Add cabbage, chicken broth together with meatballs into casserole and place on low heat and simmer for long time until its done.

It has the fragrance of the pork and crab and the color of the dish is as bright as orange.

It tastes rich but not greasy.

p/s : the most authentic lion's head , so far in KL can be found at Jade Express at Lot 10. albeit the crab and ginger taste is not that strong. but they added the most unhealthy but yummy ingredient in the middle of the meatball - salted egg york.

try it. if you're a non-Muslim. heh. (no way you could substitute the pork with chicken or turkey, as suggested by some cook book, the good taste is gone !)
my new obsession - as in food. heh.

Juno Mak 麥浚龍

i am always grateful about one thing. able to read and write chinese.

he is the only one young artist in HK that i could appreciate, especially on his passion in music (dark trip hop) and fashion (streetwear)

i got the know about his blog this morning, and i got so carried away reading it.

i like his taste in movies.

check it out ..... if you are able to read chinese.

http://www.think-silly.com/juno/

A Scanner Darkly - (same initial with Substance D)

my fav character in the movie & one of my fav actor
movie that will never get to show here. basket.

Directed by richard linklater - whom also directed before sunrise, before sunset, school of rock , etc. he filmed the movie digitally using Rotoshop - an animation tech called interpolated rotoscope which was previously used in his movie 'waking life'. he uses this tech because it could give audience an experience of lucid dreaming.

it was based on the novel by philip k. dick whose famous works include 'blade runner'.

keanu is the undercover to spy on a group of heavy drug user. the story backgroud is 'seven years from now' that is the period when US lost on war with drug. SUBSTANCE D is an highly addictive drug, to combat the war with substance d, the US government invented a scanner system which uses a 'scramble suit' to disguise a person's gender, voice and basically everything.

keanu fallen in luv with winona, a drug dealer and heavy drug user, only to realise that she is actually his boss (his superior who often disguise in the 'scramble suit' as Hank. keanu later got addicted to substance D which has stopped the two hemispheres of his brain from communicating. As a result, Arctor is no longer able to distinguish between his roles as a drug user and a policeman, which makes him incapable of performing his job as a narcotics agent. it's a conspiracy without him realising where winona is actually part of a greater police operation to infiltrate New Path, and Arctor had been selected, without his knowledge or consent, to carry out the sting. New Path is a rehabilitation program where keanu is renamed "Bruce" and put through psychological reconditioning treatments. he has serious neurocognitive deficits from his withdrawal from Substance D, which has turned him into a mentally retarded, childlike automaton. To further his rehabilitation, they send him to work at an isolated New Path corn farm.

here's the best scene , and the last scene as well, where keanu spotted rows of blue flowers hidden between rows of corn; these blue flowers are the plant source of Substance D. As the film ends, keanu hides one of the blue flowers in his boot, so that, when he returns to the city New Path clinic during Thanksgiving, he can give it to his 'friends' -undercover police agents i.e. winona

it's very pathetic to see people wasted their precious life on drug abuse.

keep your mind and body clean.

i would rate 8/10

Donnie Brasco

a more kick-ass gangsta movie - at least to The Departed

it has two of my fav actors - al pacino & johnny depp- how could i resist ?

it was based on a true story - joseph d. pistone aka donnie brasco alias Donnie Brasco, was an FBI agent who worked undercover for 5 years in NY city for the mafia Bonanno family.

johnny depp plays the role of donnie, alongside with the wise man 'lefty' -al pacino who always stood up for him. even though he knew that he was the rat in the family at last.

i luv the role of lefty more than donnie. lefty has this double characteristics. he always called himself the wise guy, he said ' a wise guy never pay for his drinks'. although he is a mafia, he has a family and enjoy watching animal planet at home. he delivers little nuances here and there that define his character and show that if he hadn't fallen in the wrong crowd decades ago, he might have turned out to be an okay guy.

his best scene is when his junkie son was hospitalised,he broke down on his knees and cried. he still remember that his son was borned in the same hospital 28 years ago, where he was lying on the bed looking sick, exactly the same thing happen after 28 years, but this time the doc said his son's heart stop beating, just like a watch stop moving. they need to pump his heart back. hearing this, depp was touched by his paternal love. he decided to stay by his side and support him throughout the ordeal. the friendship between lefty and donnie is one the most beautiful friendship in the cinematic history. they bonded within a short time. and donnie wanted to give lefty the money to get him out of the mafia because he's been wanting to do that, he just doesn't know how to get out of the mob world. the longer the two men are together the more of Lefty's behavior and mannerisms donnie seems to pick up and use even in his personal life.

another scene i like - the massacre - where they drag donnie along to do the 'cutting' for the corpses . donnie put up a good performance, you can see those muscles on his face are shivering and trembling.

they said any film about Italian gangsters seems to need a scene of cooking. true enough, there's a scene where they divide the cash money next to a kitchen table where a chef is busy baking pizza.

again 8.5/10

400 blows

famous last scene - Antoine ran to the sea and everything ended in this freeze pane
i prefer this movie poster to the other one because it has the famous last scene

i feel like doing a movie marathon so i ransacked my sister's collection of DVD

it is the film of the french new wave. also the biography of the director - François Truffaut, it was drawn directly out of Truffaut's heart. It is dedicated to Andre Bazin, the influential French film critic who took the fatherless Truffaut under his arm at a time when the young man seemed to stand between life as a filmmaker and life in trouble.

it can be divided to 3 parts

antoine in the family

antoine in school

antoine in detention centre then to a work camp

there are a few scenes that i like in the movie

1. antoine plays a rotating silinder-shaped thingy with rene. he kept moving his body upside-down in order to get the maximum excitement.

2. antoine being interrogated at the detention centre, where he tells everything about his family, how he became the unwanted burden for his family, he only lives with the mum when the relatives passed away, his mum got him before she was married and married to the step-dad just to give antoine the first name. he was fed poorly, sleep in a sleeping bag instead of a cosy bed.

3. antoine escaped from the work camp during a soccer game. he kept running for more than hours, passing by the farms, the mountain, the highway and finally into the sea. he tried to ran into the sea but he turned back.

the last scene says so much, and it rounded up the whole movie perfectly. caught between land and water, between past and future. It is the first time he has seen the sea.

i would rate 8.5/10

Muse & Air

sing for absolution was taken for this album - absolution - MUSE

one hell of a party was taken from this album - pocket symphony - AIR

MY RECENT DARLINGs it just keep looping and looping in my playlist.......

SING FOR ABSOLUTION

Lips are turning blue A kiss that can't renew

I only dream of you My beautiful

Tip toe to your room A starlight in the gloom

I only dream of you And you never knew

Sing for absolution I will be singing And falling from your grace ooh

There's nowhere left to hide In no one to confide

The truth burns deep inside And will never die

Lips are turning blue A kiss that can't renew

I only dream of you My beautiful

Sing for absolution I will be singing Falling from your grace

Sing for absolutionI will be singing Falling from your grace yeah

Our wrongs remain unrectified And our souls won't be exhumed

ONE HELL OF A PARTY (vocals by JARVIS COCKER ! )

Please do not follow where I am leading Someone must clear these things away

Here in the burnt out husk of the morning Struck out with nothing left to say

Yeah this was one hell of a party Nobody ever got to bed

But the morning after's killing me And I have to rest my head

And just where were we trying to get to I can't recall one single word

And the faces that pushed themselves before you Congeal into one, nothing transferred

This was one hell of a party And it's still living in my head

But the morning after shines so cold So follow where I live

This was one hell of a party Nobody got to go to bed

Let's face it now, it's over But this morning after's killing me

rant + dalek's abandoned language

my latest obsession - dalek's abandoned language

i've been so busy lately, with all sorts of everything and nothing. sigh.
i'm trying to change my lifestyle, to a more productive and healthy way. i think i'm slowing working my way towards it.
i think my life has come to a certain point where a change is compulsory, or else i'll be static or not moving anywhere further. be it a crisis or a dilemma. but i'm gonna face it, change it and accept it with an open mind.
i do not know how to express it, but i keep having these confused and mixed feelings towards everything and everyone that is around me.
e.g. the feeling that i used to have for element A is slowing fading away and without me realising it, the new feeling or thoughts towards it will just come and take up the space of its previous feelings. it all happen so naturally and as-a-matter-of-fact-ly.
i don't know how long this process will take place ? or it is an never-ending process so that i could keep changing myself to a better me.
life is a bitch, but i luv bitching and being bitched !
whatever it is , i am always ready.
TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL !

mahjong, lion dance, ang pow ....

plenty of 1st-time during this CNY

1. 1st time i see the world champion lion dance troop performing live , good shit ! with the pillars and them doing the stunts, mind you, the team i saw is just their junior team. i've kinda fallen in luv with lion dance after watching it. when is the annual lion dance competition that will normally be held in genting ?
2. 1st time i play mahjong, i took about few minutes to learn all the basic rules and story of each character, then i am playing ! i've fallen in luv, again. with mahjong. heh. is a brain-tickling game, you will do better if you are good at maths ,too bad i'm not :-(
3. 1st time i go for a rock concert during CNY . MUSE !
4. 1st time i get one whole week off for CNY.
5. 1st time i get crowned the queen of a fashion nite during CNY. and won lotsa pressie. yay !
6. 1st time in CNY where i only get to lou-sang for less than 5 times. heh.
7. 1st time where i didn't play any poker at all during CNY.

that's all for the 1st-time thingy.
i need to pack up my festive mood and buckle up for the year ahead !

Trip Hop - The Knowledge - Bed Club

keep walking, trip hop !

from the almighty wikipedia, i found these

Trip hop (also known as the Bristol sound or Bristol acid rap) is a term coined by British dance magazine Mixmag, to describe DJ Shadow 's hip hop instrumentals that (inspired by Organized Konfusion's track "Releasing Hypnotical Gases") changed-up the beat and pallet mid-cut, giving the listener the impression they were on a musical journey. The word trip in the title refers to a psychedelic experience. Later, the Trip Hop description was applied to a musical trend in the mid-1990s; trip hop is downtempo electronic music that grew out of England's hip hop and house scenes. Sometimes characterized by a reliance on breakbeats and a sample-heavy, often moody sound pioneered by Coldcut's remix of Eric B. & Rakim's "Paid in Full", trip hop gained notice via popular artists such as Portishead, Björk, Massive Attack, Thievery Corporation, Tricky, and rock-influenced sound groups such as Ruby, California's DJ Shadow, and the UK's Howie B.

basically the crowd is not much.

1. not many into trip hop, hip hop yes, plenty, but not trip hop.

2. it's on wednesday

3. it's at Bed.

4. not many aware about the freeflow

the knowledge is trying to educate us with trip hop. but i thought it should be darker.

to me i think the perfect trip hop party should be barely litted up, everyone dresses in black or anything lacey in black. played nothing or darker than portishead or sneaker pimp. dark, acidic, lotsa scratching, will make a great trip hop night. and of course better with free flow of any kinda of alcoholic drinks. heh.

it ended around 12. since it's a wednesday. i might as well swing by mambo jambo.

suddenly i feel like i'm hanging out with my mum & dad with their recorder on.

they said music is like wine, the older the better. i'm still pondering if it works that way for me.